Why?
As they showed picture after picture, video after video, of him dealing with 8 kids, six of them babies, I thought, what type of hell is that? Cuomo made some comment that he was going through something similar to a midlife crisis, and Jon said oh no, I am only 32, I don't want to die at 64. But seriously. He's had enough baby/childcare episodes to last him a lifetime. As anyone knows, when you are a mother and dealing with your children, you get into a routine, a rut even, and when your husband comes along, he just does everything wrong. Always. There is no reason for this other than that as the primary caregivers (breastfeeding for example) we just feel as though our entire lives are over and we are jealous.
Yes, that is the truth. We are jealous that our spouses, no matter how helpful and wonderful they are, are not the mothers. Because to a small child, the mother is everything. And to be everything to anyone or anything is exhausting and draining and though sometimes even amazing, it brings out a degree of vindictiveness we take out on our husbands and/or the father of the child.
And so how do we deal with this when we get no sleep, no encouragement, no approval that we are doing our best from the world? We lash out. Yep. We try to diminish the role of father; we try to make them feel small and useless and stupid and totally unnecessary, because it should make us feel better. It doesn't. But unless you get a ton of sleep, encouragement, approval and more sleep, chances are you won't care if you are mean. You can't be mean to your baby (or BABIES) so you go for daddy.
And then he feels guilty because he can't be EVERYTHING to his child the way the mother can (seriously, it's mostly just breastfeeding, I know father's can be primary caregivers, I am not father bashing here!) and so he lets his wife scream and yell and tell him he does everything wrong, because he probably does, so he has no true defense.
And that is the life we lead, with a little bliss snuck in there, until our children grow up. And if you make it, that's great. Onward and upward to better things. But gee, is it really a surprise that two young regular people are having a little trouble raising all those kids? Just another example of money doesn't solve anything, just in case you were wondering if it would all work out if you had all the things that money can buy.
So Kate might, might not have had an affair with her bodyguard. Well, I've seen pictures of him, and my vote is she did. That is purely based on my opinion that while traveling to promote her show she felt good; dressed up and made up and no kids around and no husband either ... time to breathe, time to be someone else for a little while. And there, attached to the hip was this good looking man who was there solely to keep an eye on you. Men have had their secretaries throughout time, now the modern woman has her bodyguard.
I want me one of those!
I don't really know why either of them would go on national television and air their dirty laundry, other than the fact that their lives are public and they made a choice (certainly not an unreasonable choice when taking into consideration how to feed, clothe and educate a slew of kids like that) to trade their privacy for money. But still, while I felt bad for the guy because if you ever watched the show, Kate was pretty brutal to him; always mean to him, I would still respect him more if he had just let the world think he was being the bad guy ... because who really cares what the public thinks?
He made a comment that at one point he and Kate went to see Dr. Phil in a last ditch attempt to save, not their marriage, but what he called the brand. The brand being their family as a TV show. It was apparent that he was horrified by this, and who knows how Kate felt as well, but it must have been enlightening to them both to realize that they were no longer partners in a traditional family; but merely two ingredients of a recipe that generated income that supported them both.
If nothing else, the constant media attention has brought their name (if not their show) more into the minds of the average American. I personally never watched the show on a regular basis. From time to time I would stop on it, but who wants to spend any amount of time with a bunch of kids like that? No thanks!
I just think we need to stop it with these "reality" shows, I really do. We have yet to see the fallout of what becomes of children who grow up with their daily lives everyone else's business, but I can't imagine it would be anything positive. And in the end, Jon and Kate are just another couple who couldn't make their marriage work. They aren't special, other than they are unusual in the fact they have sextuplets and twins. What Kate needs is a couple of good girlfriends who she can bitch to -- instead of People magazine and Larry King.
I am just saying.
1 comment:
all around a sad sad tale...and one that they will all have to live with in the public eye...for the rest of their lives.
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