Down ego! Bad ego!

Yes, this is more about the book, A New Earth -- because it is really quite fascinating.  (At least to me!  But you always have the choice to visit more exciting blogs!)

What I have been reading has been focused on the ego -- which is really quite a monster.  Ego is a conglomeration of recurring thought forms and conditioned mental-emotional patters that are invested with a sense of I, a sense of self.

Now that doesn't sound so bad, right?  Recurring thought forms, how bad can that be?  If I am not mistaken -- and heaven only knows I could be -- the problem with a sense of I is that we attach an "I am this," or "I am that," but the ultimate truth of who you are is  just ...

I am.

No this or that.

In most cases, when you say "I" it is the ego speaking -- these thoughts and emotions, a bundle of memories you identify with as the "me and my story," of habitual roles you play without knowing.

If I was squirming in my seat with the whole Feed the world with my Kirby thing, then I was really squirming when I discovered I am in love with my ego and I don't think I can become enlightened because it doesn't sound like it would be any fun.

What?

Well, apparently there is this egoic compulsive habit of faultfinding and complaining about others.  Umm, this is like my favorite sport!  And then, whilst squirming, I thought, well, gee, if I can't find fault with others, what will I BLOG about?  It's so fun to pick on people, to find faults, to dive into conspiracy theories ... I feel like Hansel and Gretl -- like I stumbled upon the house built of candy (the book) and upon getting inside find there is a big mean witch inside who is going to kill me.

For I believe without my ego, I will be ... no fun.

Yes, I said it.  And I bet if I read further I will read about how the ego will try to TRICK you into believing that it is too important, that you will lose all sense of self (ummm, hello, I think that is so!) and so therefore you will hang onto it -- and then you are back at square one.  Completely unenlightened and destined for a dark future of swirling bad thoughts and complaining complaining complaining.  (Which apparently is one of the ego's favorite strategies for strengthening itself.)

DO YOU SEE WHAT IT IS DOING?  My ego is complaining about how it doesn't want to be dissolved and therefore it is strengthening itself and I am a willing participant.  DOWN EGO!  

My puppy doesn't listen to me either when I say DOWN.  What hope do I have to keep the ego on its haunches?

And in a very confusing twist, it says that the ego's greatest enemy is the present moment, which is to say, life itself.

(A life without bitching?  Say it isn't so!)

It also says, Sometimes it becomes obvious that the ego doesn't really want change so that it can go on complaining.

I think me and my ego, we're simpatico on this!  Though when I read what it's all about, it makes me think maybe it's not such a lofty goal -- lolling around in all this ego.

When you complain, by implication you are right and the person or situation you complain about or react against is wrong.  There is nothing that strengthens the ego more than being right.

...you need to make others wrong in order to get a strong sense of who you are ... Being right places you in a position of imagined moral superiority in relation to the person or situation that is being judged and found wanting.  It is that sense of superiority the ego craves and through which it enhances itself.

And this is bad, huh?  ::::::::::::::::big sigh::::::::::::::::::::::

I read further ... and it speaks of Truth and when you find it, your actions will be in alignment with it.  

So I am off to seek the Truth, but **I** am not sure if I WANT to. 

So there.  :P