For the past several weeks now on my drive home after picking Charlie up from school, there have been a handful of homes with their Christmas lights up. Seriously? And on Halloween, the ACTUAL DAY, we were in Target looking for some costume additions, and the special holiday room they have in the back had already been transformed into a Christmas Wonderland. That is, in case dates are hard to recall, OCTOBER 31st. As Thanksgiving draws near, the "traditional" time when people drag out their Christmas paraphernalia and adorn their houses inside and out with holiday cheer, it is getting worse. I say worse because my theory is that winter is already long enough as it is. Christmas, in my mind, is a part of winter. The leaves haven't even completely fallen off the trees in October -- it is NOT time to think about Christmas.
And yet.
AND YET! I am almost done Christmas shopping. This is borne entirely out of experience -- I am almost exclusively an online shopper, and there is a reason for this too. Once I get out in the world of stores, I suddenly need everything I see. I can go from a perfectly happy non-materialistic person to a nut job stacking up her credit card with one purchase after another. FOR ME! (Point in case, I was in a kitchen gadget store looking for an apple peeler to make applesauce, and I bought a sandwich maker AND a cake thing. A glass cake stand with a cover. It is still sitting out on the wood pile in the garage. Why? Because I make cakes exactly like three times a year ... for those at home who even want me to bake them a cake. But this purchase happened to fall only days after Charlie's birthday, when I had labored over a completely from scratch chocolate cake that when I presented it, clearly needed to be on a glass stand.) I am sure next time I make a cake I will have forgotten I purchased that. Please remind me.
So, why so early with the Christmas shopping? Because now is the time to get it all shipped for free. Everyone wants your online business and the black friday deals have been going on for weeks (like the crazy early Christmas lights!) There is this urgency to make Christmas bigger and better every year because it's all about spending. SpENding and MORE spenDING. Fine. Spend away, but I intend not to spend a dime on shipping. If I can get my act together (and it appears I have!) then I can get the slowest form of shipping (aka free) and not worry because I still have over a month for it to get here. Also, UPS gets completely and totally bogged down the last weeks (believe me, I've been on the phone with them before) and while they actually ship up to Christmas Eve ... it kinda sucks when you sit and stare out the window all day Christmas Eve waiting for the package that never arrives. And when you live where I live, that means you are shit out of luck.
My early shopping, as I've said, comes from years of experience. I have spent a fortune sending an item from eBay overnight, only to find it is broken. (I very rarely buy things from eBay now because I have discovered that they are the reason you can't get things in the stores!) These buyer's buy as many of a popular item as they can then auction them on eBay before Christmas to make a profit. Ho Ho Ho you HO's! You won't get a penny out of me anymore ..... been there done that.
So it has been like Christmas here -- I have packages arriving daily and my office is stacked with it all (unopened so that prying eyes won't get a peek).
And here is another added bonus. I told the kids if they had something they really, really wanted (the true black Friday and CyberMonday are really my last shopping days) they should give me a list. (Keeping in mind I have purchased their majorities already). Charlie gave me a list that is about a grand worth of things -- topping the list is the Xbox 360. What, you ask? We don't have that? You mean he is right? We are truly the ONLY Family in America who does not have one? How can this be?
Below that are two video games for said Xbox, a remote-control helicopter that is in the hundreds (with additional and necessary accessories, ca-ching ca-ching) and then some electronic piggy bank for a hundred bucks. I think it was the look on my face (he woke me up to show me) but 20 minutes later he returned to my bedroom with a tray with homemade waffles and coffee.
Bribery works. Don't rule it out.
I actually did away with lists for a while because one year when Maddie was 8 or so, she came down on Christmas morning with her list in hand. As she received each item, she would cross it off. Later that day I saw her searching the living room amongst the debris of wrapping paper, bows and opened boxes. "What are you looking for?" I asked her. And she looked at me, pencil behind her ear, and said "I can't find my trash can." Huh? Well, that was on her list! And she had received EVERYthing on it but the trash can. Which, as she pointed out matter-of-factly, she needed for her room.
Literal people should not have Christmas Lists. They think they are contracts or something! Geesh.
So with Christmas more or less taken care of, I should probably make that Thanksgiving shopping list.
Yeah, ya think????
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