Pre-summer pleasures

Tonight it was beautiful so I packed a cooler (and so it begins!) and we headed to the lake.  The neighbors grandchildren are up and they are two girls, one is Charlie's age and the other is in 4th grade.  Maddie, who is a sophomore in high school, hung with them as well.  

They went out on the boat, they played wiffle ball until it became too dark to see anything, and then they sat out on the lawn and giggled.  And giggled and giggled.

Peter had left as soon as the sun set and I had retreated from the dock to the screen porch with my book.  The sky was pastel gorgeous and I found my eyes drifting from the page to the scene before me: the beautiful sky, the calm lake, the arc of the birch trees silhouetted against the sky, and my ears tuned into the conversation the kids were having.

Apparently the youngest little girl was negotiating with Charlie how to best ask her sister out.  How hilarious is that?  And then there would be giggles.

I was transported back in time, to the vacant lot across the street from our house in our little Bedford neighborhood, where all the big kids played kickball after dinner.  By sheer will I managed to get them to allow me to play, despite the fact I was a good five or six years younger than they were, and this little girl telling Charlie what to do reminded me of me.

Just act like you know it, and the rest will follow!!!

As it grew darker and later, I could sense an urgency in their tones:  They were all waiting to be told it was time to call it a night.  But it wasn't going to be from me.  How many times had I been called home right in the middle of something so amazingly important it makes me ache to think of it?  Countless!  Too many!  Not fair!  For my entire life, as the day ebbs into night, I grow more alive and energized.  I am a true night person, and while I don't suffer from insomnia, when I am pushed into bed before I am ready, I will lay there for hours and hours and hours.  I spent a lot of hours as a kid just being pissed off that I had to be in bed.  Or staring out the window at all the older kids who could stay up as long as they wanted to.  NOT FAIR!

Nope.  I was in no hurry to get home.  True, the kids have school tomorrow, but so what?  Today it was hot and sunny, tomorrow it could easily be in the 30's and 40's.  Seize the moment!  Live while the peepers are peeping and the boring people are sleeping, I say!

So the big negotiations that the "giggler's" were in the middle of progressed, and the little girl ran into her cottage and Maddie ran into ours and pretended to have a conversation with me, which left Charlie and the intended (so to speak) alone. Oh, before that Charlie came in and asked me what to do.  I made some comment about not being in middle school and that was it really necessary to ask someone out?

But who am I kidding?  Of course it is necessary to ask someone out.  It is HUGE.  For me, in middle school, it was Bruce Schartner and Drew Conroy.  I think they both asked me out, and I think I said yes to both of them, and that worked out fine until ski season.  That was before  the days of triple chairlifts, so I was always pushed to make a choice of who I would go up with.  Oh, the angst.  Going out meant nothing, really, other than the fact that you were going out.  We did not kiss (horrors) and when Bruce gave me a ring as a birthday present, I was horrified.  What did THAT mean?  Oh, the angst!

And that is really all it is about.  Well, at least in my innocent world, and Charlie is still quite innocent in that regard.  (Believe me, if you'd heard the giggles, you'd believe me for sure!)

So as a parent, I don't want to get too involved.  Not because I'm not interested, but because I think the purpose of it all is to figure it out on your own.  There is a lesson to be learned from expressing your feelings and putting yourself out there, at the risk of being rejected.  It can be painful, but on the other hand, it can be the best damn thing that's ever happened to you!

She didn't say yes, but she didn't say no either.  Let's be reasonable, she is of the female species, and she and Charlie have had maybe two conversations over the past 13 years.  I am sure she is thinking what the hell!  Last year he liked her so much he ran away whenever she was around.  But they all clicked yesterday and today (the motley crew if you will) and if the common goal between all of them is navigating Charlie's love life, then so be it.

The sounds of the giggling was music to my ears.  It really was.  I kept finding myself grinning myself.

Will you go out with me?