Washington antics and Dr. Seuss

The Republicans versus the Dems.  The Hatfields and the McCoys.  The upper class vs. the middle class.  It's never gonna work.

As I wandered about today on my bike on this island of Martha's Vineyard brimming with the usual mixture of the pedigreed and the not so, it is not really that hard to understand why there is no forthcoming compromise in Washington.

There is such a sense of entitlement with these people who truly believe they are better than most; they have no concept of a sense of community or charity or even simple consideration.  For one, they don't look at you.  Why not?  You are passing within milli-inches of them, why not a perfunctory nod or heaven forbid a mere smile?  It's kind of creepy.  Now obviously I can't really weed out the rich from the poor on a bike ride, but attitude goes a long way in helping me decide!  For instance, the people who ride two and three abreast on the two-way bike path and won't move and can't believe that you aren't going to pull over for them!  (Okay, I get a bit of joy out of hurling towards them full speed, I will admit, and watching their faces when it becomes apparent I would rather hit them then pull over to let them pass!)   Or the group I just passed who walked across the entire road pushing baby carriages, with one girl walking down the center line.  They didn't even look back occasionally to see if a car was coming.  Because you see, the road is theirs.  And when you pass by on a bike, they glare at you for trespassing.  Just so weird.

At the beach the other day the family that pulled in beside us on the beach was clearly not happy that we had discovered their spot.  (Obviously it was theirs because they paid for their beach pass, and had found the spot the day before.  THEIRS.  Not anyone else's who had paid the same amount of admission to the beach.  THEIRS.)  So to show their disapproval, they blocked us in by parking so we couldn't get by and then stretching their beach shit from the car to the water line.  Nice.  I must admit, I got a kick out of watching the mother.  She had her three little boys all dressed up in that sunwear garb.  No exposed skin for the little honeys.  She was in a bikini, in her well toned body that she sure as hell doesn't get watching three boys.  Yeah, I admit it, I was thinking nanny and wondering where she was.  The mother sat down under her four umbrellas (seriously, wouldn't one or two work?) and the boys were not allowed to do much of anything.  They couldn't swim unless their father watched them, and he was too busy hiding by his car and looking at his phone.  The only reason they had brought the boatload of toys was so that they could claim as much beach real estate as possible.  When it finally came time for us to leave, the father slowly moved a few toys so that we could drive on the wet sand ... not where cars are supposed to go.  When we drove by, they did not acknowledge our existence as we passed, as I mentioned earlier, within milli-inches of them.  WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?

We were up at Menemsha the other night for the sunset, and a family was sitting nearby.  The woman and I happened to look at each other at the same time, and lo and behold, we passed smiles.  Oh, it was so nice to be around a human being.  I am not sure what these other people think they are, but their human-ness has been replaced by specialness.  They are too special to be human.  They are too special to be anything but their special selves!

Now I recognize this because I can be guilty of it too.  But I fight it because I am not all that special and my bank account doesn't bolster my specialness either.  It isn't super duper and we don't abuse credit in order to pad our lifestyle.  I can't say anything about these people makes me want to be them.  I certainly don't want to inspire someone to write a blog about how obnoxious I am!!!

But here we are, on vacation, and no one is interested in getting along with anyone that isn't exactly like them.  So it would be seriously unrealistic to expect the already divisive Washington to get together and do what they are there to do -- work for the people.  But oops, which people?  The special people who deserve way more than the non-special people?  Or the non-special people who are only here to annoy the special people?

The sneetches on the beaches who have stars on their bellies.  Or the sneetches on the beaches without stars upon thars?

Always talking about the weather

Since I no longer like the sun and despise the heat, I was a little concerned about going on vacation on an island where the sun is kind of king.  After several weeks of 90-plus temperatures and non-stop sweating while sitting still, I drove onto the island and everything changed.  The temps have been heaven.  Combined with a near constant sea breeze, I have been inhaling moving air and loving every minute.  And even sitting on the beach was fine because it was never ghastly hot.  And floating in the sea, well, it's always been my thing.

We have been here since Sunday and have had a few cloudy days when we first got here that I was overjoyed with.  I have done a lot of bike riding and it is nice when the sun isn't blazing down on you.  Then we had two not-a-cloud in the sky days in a row and we stayed on the beach for hours.  Then today came along and it was cloudy with scattered sun and I was thrilled.  A perfect day to ride bikes or not feel the pressure to get to the beach/.  Love it.  I am sitting on the deck with the breeze swirling about me, the sun keeps popping out and there is no where I want to be.  No where.  But here.  Enjoying this moment, this time in a vacation where Maddie and her friend have left and the dynamics have switched back to my parents and Charlie and me -- which makes it fewer people and a little less drive to "do" anything specific.  Charlie is now in the kitchen making brownies and it is just peaceful and sweet.

In fact, I just closed my eyes and almost fell asleep listening to the wind rustling through the trees.  I guess you can call that relaxed!!!!

I just took a look at the extended forecast and it is all sunballs, with temps never climbing higher than the 80s.  Ooooooh, so looking forward to another week in paradise.

Damn worms

This year it is the cabbage worm.  I know how I will solve this in the future ... I WON'T PLANT CABBAGE.  Geesh.  So that is what I have been doing the past few hours.  Picking off tiny green worms from my plants.  Oh, those wonderful, lush plants that now all look like swiss cheese.

I actually did see the little white butterflies (or moths) flying around and thought in the back of my head it was odd.  Now I know what they were doing, laying their larvae which became the fricking worms.  I must admit these are not anywhere as disgusting as those tomato worms, but they are just as annoying.  And there are beetles too.  I hate picking those off, because they stick to your fingers.   I am completely grossed out.  I would pull the cabbage now, but it looks so darn close to done.  And beautiful ... most of the kale has been eaten, nice.  They don't like curly purple kale though, that is going strong.  They apparently don't like purple cabbage either, which I didn't plant.  Haven't hit the lettuce yet, but they are busy.

Sometimes I get chemicals.

The bear and the heron

I was driving back from dropping Charlie off at work this morning.  I wasn't in a very good mood.  It is an absolutely gorgeous summer morning and I was disgusted that Peter and Maddie were at a softball "tournament" and that just set me off with all sorts of wonder at what our society has become.  (I spent TWELVE hours yesterday sitting in an uncomfortable seat watching a softball "tournament."  I keep putting that in quotes because what it really is is a huge scam ... get parents to spend loads and loads of money to have them play in these games all weekend long.  Why?)  But anyway, that was going on in my head, in addition to the lake "stuff."  Charlie spent the night there and I had to swing through to pick him up.  And it was such a negative environment with the inconsiderates.  That is my word for family members who can't see beyond themselves.  So THAT was in my head also!

So as I drove with my busy negative head going's on, I was going down this hill when I saw something loping across the road.  It was HUGE.  I mean, as soon as my brain clicked that it was a ginormous black bear, I slowed down because I felt fear.  The thing was seriously the biggest bear I'd ever seen (and living around here I've actually seen quite a few) and it was loping across the road with such power ... and I was in a Jeep.  I put the windows up (no roof, but I am sure that would have saved me!) and approached it cautiously.  It had gone to the side of the road by now, but I was really sort of panicked that it was going to come out and attack.  I don't know why.  Because of its size I guess.  I could see it in the woods, so I just went by.

As I continued on my way I thought, wow, that was so big!  And yet, so graceful.  And so black and healthy looking.  It glistened, for want of a better word, in the sunshine.  It was a beautiful bear and now that it was behind me, I was no longer afraid.  And then I looked up in the sky, for no reason, and a blue heron was flying by.  And I got it.  I literally laughed out loud and felt myself flush through from head to toe with positive energy and joy.

Two signs, on an amazingly beautiful summer morning, to remind me to get the hell out of my head and shut uppa myself!  And why are the bear and the blue heron significant?

I have done shaman workshops and through the process of shamanic journey have discovered that the animal that comes to me when I travel to the lower world is a bear.  A big black bear that always envelopes me in a bear hug if you will, and makes me feel safe and comforted.  So that bear came to me to remind me, and yet, it wasn't enough.  I didn't get it.  So the blue heron, which is my power animal, also came.  It was freaky, and yet, intuitively I know that it wasn't freaky at all.  It was a reminder that if you are aware, then it all makes sense.

And sometimes you need a big black bear and a beautiful bird to jog you back into a place of wellness.

So I thank you, universe, for that amazing message.  Just so you know, I got it :)

p.s.  I chose the rather whimsical bear picture above because it best reminded me of what "my" bear looked like.  All the other google images were of sort of scrawny looking bears.  Mine was amazing.  And while this picture doesn't depict him, it does sort of show his energy.

More iPad gushing

I just love my iPad.  I have said this before but it is worth stating again.  Love it!

I am thoroughly enjoying reading Oprah magazine on it -- which has a fully developed app that manages to blow me away at every page.  First, I "turned the page" and this eye pleasing colorful presentation took place before my eyes ... all about the 25 years of Oprah.  It was like a surprise fireworks show or something.  Love it.

Then I was in the Book Corner, and there was a picture of a stack of books.  It said to tap a book for more information.  So I tapped one.  A picture of the author and a short synopsis popped up, and at the bottom I could choose a variety of things, so I chose a sample.  Read that and decided I wanted the book.  Tap, tap, off to Amazon the iPad went, and within seconds I had purchased the book at the top of the stack.  I returned to the stack and tapped the next one.  Rinse and repeat.  I started downloading samples, because all of this interactivity is a tad ADHD -- I mean, I set out to read Oprah magazine, not seven different novels!

But love love love it!  Love the little videos that pop up, love love love it.  Okay.  Sorry, but I had to gush.  I had to!

Off to read more!

No Impact Man

http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/no-impact-man/

 There is a strong pull from deep within me that wants to be someone other than who I am.  I don't say that in an existential manner.  What I mean is that I want to not be a participant in this consumer-driven society.  I want to live in harmony with the planet and reap true benefits.  Not drive up credit card bills.

I am actually not a shopper, but like anyone, I like new things.  I don't shop as sport and I could care less about a bargain.  If I need something, then I buy it as soon as it is in front of me.  And online shopping is my greatest guilty pleasure, if you will.  But the possibility of having little to no impact on the planet appeals to me more than a new pair of shoes.  It appeals to me a lot.

I thoroughly enjoyed watching the documentary, No Impact Man, which is about a New York city-based family that goes without eating in restaurants, eating anything that doesn't come from the local farmer's market in fact, eventually they do without electricity and they ride no public transportation, etc.  Now the wife, Michele Conlin, goes to work everyday where there is electricity, ice and so on, but ultimately in the end she has no desire to return to her caffeine addiction or even to have TV in the apartment.  What she finds is that the great sacrifices brought her to a new realization that if you are seeking something, you can probably find it right in front of you.

I like that message.  I believe in it.  And I haven't, always.

I am currently reading this book and I have been devouring it like I would a juicy novel.  It is full of scientific mumbo jumbo that for some reason I can understand as though it is comprehensible.  Which I guess ultimately it shouldn't be, but like I said, it is.  I think this is because I have always had this feeling, this knowing if you will, that the big shit was going to hit the fan, and to have it spelled out for me is more comforting than discouraging.

One thing I found that resonated with me was that it is almost dangerous when people recycle and grow their own food, because it almost gives them a moral justification to carry on their not-so-less impactful ways without any guilt.  I agreed with that except for the part that I do have guilt.  I hate driving in the huge SUV and that my big huge house is completely energy-UN-efficient.  And I don't feel as though I am helping any of that with the guilt-free light bulbs or turning off things that don't need to be on.  And having a small garden makes me feel as though I should do more -- grow more and can more and be more self-sufficient.

What is hard to battle is the self-loathing that I don't do more.  That even though I KNOW there are so many more things I could do to lessen my carbon footpath, I do not.  And the reason why is that I too, am in the state of denial that the majority of humanity suffers from, though I try to fight it.

As I rode in the boat last night with a beautiful sky above me and the planet around me seeming to be about as perfect as it could get, I thought, as I've thought many times before, what comes next?  When (if?) this Great Disruption takes place, what happens to all the gasoline powered boats?  Will such frivolous things as pleasure boats be discontinued due to the fact that they are not necessary?  Or will that pleasure continue as technology closes the gap and the gasoline engines are converted to electric in those very same boats?  I don't know.

And then I thought, really?  This is where your thought process goes when the essential fabric of our society is going to be torn to shreds?  What is going to happen to the pleasure boats?   It is like a running battle inside my head ... what is going to happen, and damn, what a beautiful night.  I think it is healthier to be in the moment -- to breathe in deeply and take in the magnificence of the planet.  But it's also just naive to forget that it is in jeopardy.

This is just a new take on Peak Oil and all the disaster that brings with it, but the headliner in this book is climate change.  Are they one and the same?  Is peak oil not just a symptom of the bigger problem of a consumer-based society?  And the consumer-based society that is eating up its resources at an alarming rate with no intent to stop is also looking at all the crazy weather-related disasters as oh well, whatchya gonna do?

Does Paul Gilding, who claims everything he states in this book is based on scientific fact, really right?  Do I have any faith in scientists when I don't in doctors?  Or do I have faith in certain scientists, certain doctors?  Who am I to judge?  Who am I at all?

I've said this before, and I will say this again.  It is a question that has haunted me since I was a small child.  I would ask, to no one in particular, but as I have grown (I don't want to be as egotistical as to use the word evolved) through the decades, I believe I was speaking to someone for sure, the question WHY AM I HERE?

And I would get no answer.  And as I have lived my life I have examined my certain talents and wondered if I was squandering them, but in the end, I don't think I was put on this earth to write novels or run an organic restaurant or even have a successful blog.   All of these things are certainly attainable, but if they were meant to be, then I certainly would have done it.  Right?   I'm not lazy, which has always made me curious that I wasn't highly successful at one endeavor or another.  And yet, I AM highly successful in the fact that I have raised three wonderful children and believe that I have instilled in them a certain value system that will bode them well in the upcoming future.  And most of the time I truly believe that my barometer of success (outside the world's barometer of success being where you are in your career and how much money you make) is the right one.

It's not that difficult being me, believe me.  The level of success I have reached in living a full life, with amazing traveling opportunities and acquisition of material things to the degree that I have is certainly enviable.  And that I say and just shake my head, because that is the stuff that DOESN'T MATTER AT ALL!  What is really successful is a 25-plus year marriage and three amazing, respectful, smart, dedicated and brilliant children~!  So why didn't I put that first?  Because society doesn't dictate that as success.  Show me the money.

Well, fuck you, society.  Humanity.  And anyone else that believes that a BMW trumps my Jeep.  It's all just metal on wheels and it's all emitting dangerous gasses into our stressed ecosystem and we're all going to be deep in the shit and well you know what?  That just excites the hell out of me.

Why?  Because THAT is why I am here.  To what level, to what end, I have no idea.  That is just the beginning of the excitement.  Because all of it -- the material stuff -- you can take away, as long as you leave me with what is important, and that is my family.  And it will be my job to show them the way.  It already is, but they aren't ready to listen.  And that is fine.

I am not even going to share what I have learned through my reading, because no one wants to hear it.  And I don't blame you, it is scary shit.  But I will leave you with this to ponder.  Right now, as a society we are using 1.4 planets worth of resources.  If we continue on with a growth-based economy (and remember, you are only going to vote for Obama if he promises more growth) in 2050 we will need four planets to sustain that type of growth.

I fully intend to be here in 2050, and it is pretty plain to see that since we only have this one planet, something WILL happen, some adjustment, some Great Disruption ... and if you believe Gilding, and I do, it already has started.

I'm ready for whatever comes.  Are you?  (Keep in mind, I've always loved scary rides.)